Okay, so clearly I’m struggling to figure out how to keep blogging. I’m working on it. 🙂 At first it was just too painful, and then I just didn’t have anything to say that seemed important. And then I was just tired. LOL. So I am trying, but I’m just not sure if I’m ready to plunge back into this world again.
On the TTC front… we aren’t “trying,” but we aren’t preventing… I’m aware of my fertile signs and try to act on them… but I’m trying to move on a little bit. I haven’t given up… I don’t know if it’s possible for me to give up… but I’m trying to move ahead with other areas of my life and have peace with anything that may or may not happen. God is in control and that is good enough for me.
I am really into energy work, specifically traditional Chinese medicine (TCM). I love it! And I’ve found a new modality that is more peaceful and efficacious than any I’d previously dabbled in. It isn’t TCM by any means, but it is a form of energy work and does some muscle testing and such. It’s called The Emotion Code (and the Body Code which is sort of a step or 2 more advanced than just the EC). I’m working through that right now to try and restore some fertility. We’ll see what happens. It sort of incorporates a lot of different types of healing that I’ve looked into over the years. I really like it. Most recently we found that I had “mold” growing on my thyroid. I don’t know if that’s literal or figurative (energy work is often metaphoric), but it totally resonated and made sense to me. When mold grows, it isn’t like frosting on a cake that just sits on top and you can easily scrape off… it sort of soaks through like melted butter on toast. There’s really no way to separate the 2 once it’s there, the only way to get rid of it is to get rid of the toast… or in this case thyroid. So from that perspective it really made my autoimmune thyroid make sense to me… that’s a good visual for me as to why my body is attacking itself. It isn’t a “betrayal” but still my body doing its very best to try to heal. Anyway, I had to take some Aryuvadic (sp?) medicine (neem pills) to try and resolve that “mold.” I think it worked, but it was pretty brutal while I was taking it. Migraines and intestinal distress, and severe roaming pains. Craziness! But hopefully it worked… worth a shot anyway. 🙂
Most of my time is spent with my kids. I feel so incredibly blessed to be able to stay home with them… and I am just so grateful to be able to homeschool. It is seriously one of the BEST decisions I’ve made in my life! It’s going really well. My son is really ahead of his grade level in reading especially, in everything he is at least slightly ahead, but reading and comprehension he is just crazy good. He’ll be 8 this year and he can out read some of the high schoolers in our neighborhood. I take a really “Classical Education” approach, but it is mixed slightly with the Charlotte Mason type format. It takes time and energy, but really so much easier now that we’ve found an EXCELLENT curriculum to follow, (Memoria Press if you’re interested) and now that we’ve really gotten into our groove. I’m starting a really light sort of pre-school for my little girl. She’s 3 now. I found some really cute little workbooks for her to start learning basic skills… it’s Rod and Staff, they have a pre-school set for 3 year old and a set for 4 year olds. I think we’ll do both before we start the pre-school for our official curriculum. Our curriculum is pretty advanced and moves along pretty quickly, so I think it will be good to lay a really good foundation first…. Plus, she loves being involved in school with big brother. She gets so excited when she gets things right. Fist pumps and lots of “yay!” and the cutest little face she pulls.
Anyway that’s about it. We got rid of most of our “baby stuff” last week. It was hard for me emotionally. It wasn’t giving them away because we were giving up… just sort of deep spring cleaning and dejunking… making room for whatever happens next in life. I’m okay with it, I think. It was my husband’s idea… he loves to clean and organize and dejunk. He has zero emotional attachment to any material item. He thinks that if we make room in our lives then it can be filled with what’s next… including a possible baby. “And if anything, Murphy’s law will get us pregnant and we’ll get to buy all of it again.” Hmmmm. I can hope for it anyway. It was still hard to let go and I did some mourning… but now I think it’s okay. It’s nice to be more organized anyway. *sigh* It is what it is. Let’s all vote for Murphy’s Law.