I was Not meant to be a druggie…

Seriously, how do drug addicts do this? lol. I HATE needles! HATE. Like I am a needle fainter. I actually pass out from just seeing a needle sometimes… it hasn’t happened in a few years, but it’s there under the surface. There’s a whole long story to it, but it boils down to the fact that I hate needles… a lot. I’ve passed out just walking into a hospital because of the “hospital smell.” I know that makes me a freak, and I’m not normally that bad anymore.

But I’m just letting you know how strong my desire for having more children is… the fact that I am willingly shoving needles into my own stomach daily… is something beyond what anyone who knows me would have believed possible. I almost passed out the first time I did it. I had to actually lie down for a few hours afterward because I was getting all “shocky.” Yes, I’m a giant pansy. 

So yesterday I had an ultrasound to check on my follicles. They are responding well, but very slowly. So they want me to do extra hormone injections. The injections are $110 per day. So I’m just buying one at a time, because I don’t want to buy any that I’m not actually using. (I bought a big pack for the original set of injections that everyone has to do, but these extra ones are on a day by day basis). So I also have to mix the solution new every day. And I must not have heard the nurse correctly when she told me how to mix this daily kind… because I SWEAR she pointed to a specific measuring line on the syringe and said “water to this line, then mix it with the powder (hormone), then inject into your stomach.” The line that I swear she told me to fill the water up to, well it just was NOT enough water. The medicine mixed all right and was clear… but it was too thick to fall with gravity. I couldn’t get the medicine to inject into me. I had to stab myself repeatedly, trying to get all of the medicine out of the syringe. Finally, I used the needle to get a little more water in the syringe, and then one more poke (with a very dull needle by now) into my stomach, and finally got everything out of the syringe. Seriously, torture. LOL. I may have to lie down and eat some chocolate to make me feel better… because that was a really crappy way to start my day today. 

Also, because my follicles are responding so slowly, they expect to do the insemination on Friday or Saturday… and hopefully not any later than that. 

And just specifics for me, so I have them written down somewhere for a record… (and I’ll do a whole timeline post once we’re done with this cycle, again just for a record)… 

The follicle is sort of the “egg sac” on your ovary. They are unable to see an actual egg on ultrasound, so the follicle is the only way to judge what’s going on. As the egg grows, so does the follicle. In order to do the IUI (insemination) they want between 1-3 follicles which measure 16mm. More than 3 follicles and they will refuse to do the insemination because of the risk of too many multiples (think 6 babies at once). A full size follicle indicates the possibility of an egg, but doesn’t guarantee its presence or viability. 

So as of yesterday I had 2 follicles, one on each ovary, that were close to 12mm. (One was just under 11mm, the other just barely over 12mm.) Follicles grow between 1-2mm per day. If it takes too long to grow the follicles, they will scrap this iui cycle and make me try again at a higher hormone dose. So now I’m on daily injections of the gon.al F to try and make them grow at the faster 2mm per day rate. 

Once they are 16mm, we do the trigger shot to force ovulation. Ovulation happens within 36 hours of the trigger shot. So they want to do the insemination 24 hours after the trigger shot. That way there are sperm waiting in the uterus when I ovulate. And hopefully ovulation will occur within 4-6 hours of the insemination. 

I will have another ultrasound tomorrow morning to see how they are progressing. If they are a full 16mm, we’ll do the trigger shot (of hcg) on Thursday to force ovulation, and then insemination on Friday. If they are 15mm, they will say no more gon.al F shots, but let’s give them a few days to grow slowly on their own, do the trigger shot on Friday and insemination Saturday. If they are only 14mm or less, they will continue with daily gon.al F shots, and hope to get them big enough for Saturday. If they don’t respond to daily shots by Saturday, we’ll be in danger of not being able to use this cycle. 

Come on little follicles, GROW!!! Grow babies grow!!! 

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One thought on “I was Not meant to be a druggie…

  1. Needles to the stomach, it makes me shiver all over just thinking about it. You are a brave woman. So many sacrifices and the possibility of 6 babies is scary. So excited for you.

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