The End of a Love Affair

Okay, maybe not quite that dramatic. LOL. As many of you know, my 5 year old Simon has had a crush on a girl for … basically his entire life. Pretty seriously. She’s the daughter of a good friend of mine, and only lives a couple houses away, and we go to the same church. Even as a baby, he was trying to hold her hand. But as they’ve gotten to kindergarten, and are in the same class, it has definitely intensified. He’s too young for this crap! LOL.

Almost daily he draws hearts with her name on it, or proposes marriage to her, or tries to get me to deliver love letters to her… sigh… he has even asked me, with great concern, “what if her daddy doesn’t like me when we get married?” LOL. Pretty cute, but really I don’t want him thinking about girls yet… not for about 20 more years. šŸ™‚

Well it has officially ended. While I’m grateful that it has ended, because I do think it’s too early, it was still kind of hard how it happened. But I’m trying to make it into a positive “teaching moment” for him. About 2 weeks ago he came home from school, and with his eyes full of tears he asked me “(name withheld) says she doesn’t want to marry me… Will nobody ever want to marry me, because I’m just a disgusting boy?” LOL. So sad and so sweet. Of course a 5 year old girl thinks that all boys are “just disgusting” and truly they are… little booger eaters, laughing at farts and poop, basically the more disgusting a subject, the more funny it is to them…

Then last week at parent teacher conference, Simon’s teacher mentioned to me that he and this girl were “no longer an item.” Um, excuse me? Were they ever? I thought it was a crush only on his side? But apparently she used to make a point of always sitting next to him and playing with him, to the point that the teacher noticed and thought they were “an item.”

And this Monday he came home from school with his first war wound… a raised goose egg/knot the size of a 50 cent piece on his shin that is now an ugly bluish brown… apparently she kicked him. He doesn’t know why, he said he wasn’t even playing with her. (Which being a girl, actually kind of explains it to me. LOL.) But at least that clinched it for him, he doesn’t “love” her anymore. *phew!*

While it’s a hard lesson to learn, we really have been trying to make this into a good teaching moment… and I’m almost grateful for it because it’s a lesson I REALLY want him to learn well… and long before he needs to know it. We been trying to convince him that when he chooses someone to marry (in like 20 years) that she needs to be someone who is nice and who chooses the right; who loves Jesus and who loves Simon more than anyone else. She needs to be someone who thinks that Simon is the most amazing and special boy in the world. We’re trying to teach him how to treat her with respect, but also to never put up with disrespect of any kind… and trying to teach him that he deserves more than somebody who doesn’t like him or who doesn’t treat him well.

It’s an important lesson, and I’m glad we’re able to start talking to him about it now (while he still listens to us and thinks that mommy has all the answers), so maybe it will stick somewhere in his subconscious later in life. So while this whole thing has been a little sad, it’s also been a blessing. While we’re still teaching him to be nice to her, and while I’m positive she is… and will continue to grow into… a very wonderful girl…. I am absolutely ecstatic to hear my little boy say that he doesn’t want to marry her anymore because he deserves someone who is nice to him. If he can really learn that lesson this early, then I’ll be forever grateful for this sad little heartbreak in kindergarten.

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One thought on “The End of a Love Affair

  1. šŸ˜¦ This is so sad and so sweet all at the same time. I love his take on it and you are so right…plugging things into their subconscious now is the way to go, especially considering they will think we don’t know anything in a few years. I remember thinking my Mom had no clue but yet I still remember every bit of advice she gave me. Growing up sucks, and relationships can really suck – too bad we can’t just shield them from it all!

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